October 29, 2007

Preemies.. Now you would think that at 34 weeks we'd have no issues... WRONG!!!
First off I am VERY happy to say that the girls have no major issues like Aiden had, however with that said i have discovered Morgan has an hernia just like Aiden had (in her belly button). It was never discovered in the NICU and I just thought she has an outie until the other day when i noticed it has gotten a bit bigger and when she was crying (as babies do) it pops out like Aiden's did.
I can push it back in, as I could with his too, but I'm afraid it will get big like Aiden's did and cause a problem. Are there any moms out there whos little ones had a belly button hernia and it went away..?? How big did it get and how long did it take?

I can't compare to Aiden since his was fixed by having surgery because it got stuck and never came close to correcting. Another thing I'm not sure how common it is.

Another thing my poor Morgan has is reflux that so many moms know about. she never spit up that much in the NICU, that was more Riley's thing, but now she has it pretty bad. she doesn't puke often but you can tell it comes back up and makes her uncomfortable. One minute she is so happy and the next tense and coughing and gagging.. She even coughs a lot when sleeping. I feel so bad for her.

As for Riley well (other then her crazy toes) she is fine. No hernia and although she was the "spitter" in the NICU she doesn't seem to have reflux at all.
To explain about the toes, there super long. It's like the child has hands on her feet.. ha ha
She'll be picking things up with them in no time I tell you. One of her feet has really "crazy toes" I'll have to try and take a picture with out her curling them around my finger to show you all. The base of that one foot (near the nuckles) seems to be wider then the other and she has a big gap between the big toe and the next toe. There funny and cute now but Chuck fears it could affect her foot so the pedi is going to look at it at the next appt in Nov. I'm just hoping it's nothing and that her only problem in life might be that it will not be fashionable to wear open toe shoes.. (ha ha ha)

Both the girls are eating well, Riley has seemed to caught up to Morgan who was eating about a third more then her. Now some feeding Riley leaves Morgan in the dust. They are still on 24 cal formula but I am going to bump them down to "normal calories" which is 20 starting this week. There weight gain is fine, there both eating, and doing well. They sleep pretty well most of the time however they have there moments where all they want to do is eat and between the two of them I am feeding one every hour on the hour. (That can be a bit tiring)
The longest sleep run they have gone ever is 5 hrs the shortest is and hour, but even if ones goes 5 hrs the other one is always up in between that so there are no 5 hr sleep runs for the rest of us.

Me and Chuck try to do shifts which worked well but since today is his first night back to work (he works 3 to 11) it's going to be tough and I am sure we will be more sleep deprived then we already have been.
I just have to promise myself to split the time and not try to do it all myself (my worst habit is trying to "do it all" and let him sleep when he has to work and then in the end I just feel like crap)

We often forget taking care of the kids is a full time job too.. An outside job is sometimes a break more then work..

October 23, 2007

So it's been a little crazy, a little fun, and not a whole lot of sleep, but i'd do it all over ten fold to have all my babies here with me like they are now.
The girls are doing well. The last weigh in was on Sunday and Riley weighed 5 lbs 15 oz and Morgan weighed 5 lbs 14 oz (which means Riley gained 1 lb 8 oz since birth and Morgan 2 lbs)

They are not on the same eating schedule but I've gotten them pretty close to where I want them. Roughly about 30-45 mins apart works well for me. That way i can get one fed and settled and then the other.

Morgan is also sleeping better at night now that Riley is home. The first few nights she didn't really want any part of her crib. It was either with me on her car seat she wanted. Now she does fine. They both seem to really like the car seats though.

We haven't done much, since lack of sleep kinda makes you feel a bit more over whelmed when you are awake. We did make it to the Keene NH pumpkin festival (which was way to busy to have 2 strollers so we didn't stay long) but the girls did great on the 2 hr ride there and back.
It was also a beautiful day out yesterday so we went for a walk and took the wagon. Can you believe it was 82 (in late Oct) that is New England weather for you..

I tried the halloween costume on Riley today (and you will all have to wait for a pic) but let me tell you... OMG sooooooooooooooo cute... lol

I can't believe they are growing so fast. Riley has busted out of preemie clothes cause she is too long for them. Morgan can still wear them cause she is an inch and a half shorter but she is starting to push the limit with some of them.

I also took a pic of the girls with Aiden. He looks so huge compared to them. My littel boy is not so little, or so it seems in the pic.

(The pics of the kids in the wagon are on Aiden's blog, so you'll have to check them out too!)

Mommy and the Girls...

Morgan, Riley, and Aiden

Morgan making that face she always makes... lol

Riley trying to look at everything all at the same time..

Sissy hold my hand...
I just love this pic...

October 17, 2007

THERE HOME !!!

Yay! Riley came home today so now both my girls are home.. It is such a good feeling. i couldn't get to the NICU fast enough and then out of there quick enough just to know i don't have to go back.
Morgan as you know came home on Friday leaving the NICU weighing 5 lbs 1 oz and Riley came home today weighing 5 lbs 9 oz.

There both doing well, sleeping right now, and happy.. I am about to get ready to feed Morgan who should be up soon and go check on Riley and Aiden who are both in there cribs sleeping. (Morgan is in her seat til she wakes up so I can feed her, just like Ri was.)

I posted som pics I took from today..

Welcome home girls... You have made your mommy a happy camper... I FINALLY have my babies all in the same place.. Aiden, Morgan, & Riley.. I love you all so much.. My only wish to be complete would be that Chase was here too, but he is always in my heart and mind and I know I will see my angel baby again some day.. I love you too little man.. xoxo

October 14, 2007

Happy Birthday to Keisla (the girls' godmother) we hope you have a wonderful day!

As for the girls, well Morgan is home, we just had overnight number 2, which went well. The first night she didn't want to sleep unless she was laying next to me or on my chest. So that is how we spent the night. Me staring at her and her sleeping on me or next to me. Needless to say Mommy didn't get too much sleep.
Last night, Daddy took over. Chuck had to work so we went to my moms to visit and got home after he was out of work. Aiden went right to bed and Morgan was sleeping in her seat (which she loves so it seems) Mommy went to bed since the kiddo's were all snoozin too. Daddy stayed up for a while and when Morgan woke up he kept her in the living room with him and fed her. So YES mommy got some sleep. Solid sleep from about 12:30 to 4:30 when Aiden woke up crying. I put him in bed with me and we fell back to sleep til I got up at 6:45.
Daddy is now sleeping, Aiden is still sleeping, Morgan is sleeping and the milk is in the fridge.. LOL
I guess I can chill out on the futon with Morgan until feeding at the zoo begins.

As for Riley, I didn't get to see her yesterday so i will go in today after the visiting nurse comes to check on Morgan. I miss her so much. The plan has changed and instead of her being home yesterday or today it was changed til Monday because she had a few second spell the other day. Well friday she had on when I was holding her so now we are on hold. They nurse thinks it is due to minor reflus since she dips and comes right back in seconds on her own, no stimulation needed. However since it is the week end we have to wait for the doctor on Monday to decide if the Friday spell will hold Riley til Wed now. We won't know until tomorrow morning! UGH!!

I have to say having just one baby home is already busy and the thought of two home scares the crap out of me. At the same time I can't bare to heave one here and not the other. It feels wrong, unfair, and makes me sad. I love all my babies the same and they should all be together. Just a few more days!!!

October 11, 2007

Today was the day I was scheduled for a c-section to have the girls. Instead I am preparing for Morgan to come home tomorrow from the NICU, and just got the word that Riley has decided to step it up and should be home either Saturday or Sunday.

How excited am I??? VERY !!!

I am now thinking of the million things I need, want, and have to have done before tomorrow. House cleaned to MY LIKING, the bedroom organized, the changing table moved, all laundry done, and the car vacuumed. Yeah the last one is just a pet peeve that has been annoying me cause it's messy and I hate it. I deal with it, and part of it being messy is my own fault but it still erks me, ya know.

So that is the news. I am still flying high.. It's killing the ache of not being able to go see them tonight and having to leave there last night 5 minutes after I got there cause Aiden was with a sitter and having a fit. It's not like him to just cry and cry and that is what he did.. Cried and cried and cried, so I left the girls knowing there ok and went to rescue my little man. I got there and he was a bit whiny but once we got home he was ok, until he got super over tired then he was a beast to get to bed.. UGH
I do believe my baby boy (who is not so little anymore) had his first episode of separation anxiety and missed his mommy.

For having a rough day yesterday, today has some what made up for it. Morgan will be home tomorrow and Riley this week end. Our family will all be under the same roof, how much better can it get. (Well unless someone has the lottery numbers they can share with me?? Hmmm )

October 9, 2007

One full bottle, two full bottles, three full bottles then four... LOL
Yes Morgan took 4 in a row, actually 6 in a row if you count before midnight (and I do) YAY. This was the other day and then she got her first tubby (by me) yesterday and I feed her again and she took almost a full bottle. I think the bath took a lot of energy out of her, the poor little thing.
SHe is doing so well that they now changed her feeding schedule to a PRN (as needed) so she can sleep and wake when she wants to and eat what she can. If she sleeps for 5 hours and then decided not to eat they will gavage feed her and if she does this too often she will return to an every 4 hr schedule. However if she does well with it then we are looking at her coming home Friday.. That is in 3 more days. I am so excited to have her coming home. I sware now I can think of 1000 things I need to do, like straighten out the damn bedroom.. UGH

As for Miss Riley, well she took a full bottle for me last night at 9, then fell fast asleep. After that she took more then half from all her bottles which is good for her since she was only taking 5cc's a few days ago. We think she'll be home not long after Morgan. A week or less, but it's going to be weird having one there and one here. Visiting the NICU might become a bit more complicated, but then again daddy will be home from work so maybe it will work out just fine.

As for me well last Friday i started taking Reglan to help with my milk since I am not a very good dairy cow after all. After 4 days on it I stopped taking it last night before I jumped out of my own skin. When you start taking it, the 1st day you take 1 pill the 2nd two and the 3rd to the 12th day you take three, then day 13 you take 2 and day 14 you take 1. Well i made it to day 4, and my second dose and decided NO MORE. I was feeling very weird, restless, anxious, and had insomnia really bad. No matter what I did i couldn't get comfy and felt like I had restless leg syndrom all over my body. It was terrible. Then I was driving last night and was really short of breath, I was jittery, and my vision was blurry to the point I had to pull over. I was getting a head ache (which I still have) and just feeling out of sorts. It obviously had to be the meds so I looked it up on the internet. YUP it was the meds.. I am not one who usually gets any of those random side effects drugs say you can get, but this time I had a ton of them. I skipped the 3rd dos last night and haven't take it again. I still have the head ache like I said but the jitters have gone away for the most part and my vision has improved. I don't feel like I am going to drive off the road now or tear my skin off.

All I can say is it was all for a good cause and I did everything I could to help myself get milk for my girls but I am not going to sacrifice my health for something I am not sure will even work. And I don't think I could of taken another day feeling like I was feeling any way.
It may work for some people and god bless them if it does but if anyone has taken it and had the reaction I have had then I am sure you will agree with me. No Reglan for this chick!!

I look at it this way.. My girls have been getting my mil even if it's not a lot. They get at least 2 bottles a day each of my milk and the rest formula. That isn't so bad. As long as I can keep it up I will and they say the first few days are the absolute best and the first 3 weeks are the most important for them to get all the good stuff.

So to all you bad dairy cows out there, you can add another member. To all you over abundent cows.. Pphhhhffffttttt is what I say to you.. lol :oP

I am about to pack up Aiden and bring him to his auntie's then go in to see the girls so if anything changes I will let ya know..

October 6, 2007

FULL BOTTLES.. YAY

Morgan took a full bottle for me yesterday and Riley took 20 ml's. How excited was I?? I think I did a jig.. Well I told Riley if she would take atleast 20 I'd dance a jig for her, and she did so I did too. LOL
Then today.. (drum roll) guess who surprised there mommy and took a full bottle.. YES Miss Riley Lorene. I came in and the nurse told me and I almost fell down. I was so excited that it made me hyper. By the end of the night she took one full and almost a second full feed. Morgan has come close too. They are catching on, it's my pep talks telling them this is all they need to get sprung and out of that place.
The nurse tonight said that she has twins before that did the same thing, that they told the parents that in about a week and a half they might be close to going home, then she got the honor of calling them two days later to tell them one of there girls was coming home and the second twin went home the next day. It's like a switch she said, it clicks on and they just get it, so here is hoping our switch clicks very soon and out little ones are home in there own crib driving us crazy really soon... I miss them.. Until then I am off to get some sleep.. If I can manage to get comfy. I've been feeling jittery tonight and can't seem to get comfy at all.. UGH
Hope my girls and Aiden are sleeping better then I am..

October 4, 2007

Together Again!!

Morgan Kennidi

Riley Lorene

Babies are doing well and I am proud to say both breastfed yesterday and today like champs. I tried Riley today at her 6pm feeding and she did great for 15 minutes. I then did Morgan at 8 who did awesome too. I tried Riley again at 9 and she was just too tired and wanted no part of it. She much rather sleep, which she did on my chest all snuggly and cute.

When I got in today they finally had there new crib and were sleeping together. (SO CUTE!) and Riley had her shirt on that said "If you think I'm cute you should see my twin". Morgan however didn't have hers on, besides it was changing time soon enough any way.

When I did change them tonight, lets just say the pictures say it all.. (DOUBLE TROUBLE)
I'm still falling in love with the fact that these beautiful babies are mine.

Morgan also too 35 from a bottle today.. Almost a full bottle, how awesome is that. Riley never got a bottle today since I breast fed her when I got in and then tried again at 9, she probably won't get one at midnight and will have to wait until tomorrow.

We are getting close in so many ways, we just need to catch up on feedings. There weights are good too. Riley was 4 lbs 13 oz and Morgan was 4 lbs 5 oz.. One more day down is one more day closer to home..

October 3, 2007

I saw the girls last night, I got in about 6:15 and couldn't hold Riley cause of the, once there feeding we leave them alone rule. (it really depends on the nurse) I felt so bad cause she was wide awake and holding my hand and staring at me like why are you not taking me out mommy. So I waited it out til her next feed at 9.
Morgan got fed at 8 and I took her out, we changed her, took her temp and weight and dressed her. Then i tried to bottle her (not breatfeed) so I could see how much she took. Not so bad she took 21 for me, which is about half for her. A full feed for Morgan is 43ml's.

We hung out til 9 and it was Ri's turn. Same routine and in the mean time I let Annette (Aiden's godmother) hold Morgan (something some nurses frown on but too bad I say.) Then we tried to bottle Ri. No such luck, she took 2, and well I think most of that was on the bib, she wanted no part of the bottle.. I was bummed out...
It's so hard when you just want to show them how it's done. You just want to give them your knowledge and tell them once you get this you can come home baby girl. UGH!!!

I am taking it one day at a time cause it's all I can do, but please pray that they get it soon. It's heart wrenching to not have them home, to not see them everyday and to have them struggle no matter how little the struggle is compared to some. I've been down the super roller coaster ride of the NICU and all it's struggles, I don't wish it upon anyone, and although this NICU stay should be a breeze, I still hurt inside not having my babies home with there family.

October 1, 2007

Baby Blues, Hormones, Grrrrrrrr...

I didn't get to see my girls today and that just sucks. With Daddy still in and out of work trying to save as many days as he can for when they come home, it leaves us searching for a sitter since I am still not allowed to pick up Aiden due to my C-section. Even if he was home it still leaves us searching for a sitter to go see the girls, which hasn't been as easy as it sounds. So today made the 2nd day (not in a row) that I wasn't able to go in to see, hold and feed them. The first day was a super baby blues day. I broke down in tears when things fell through and I couldn't go in. (I also am not allowed to drive yet which is a real pain in the butt cause I can't go in alone and leave Aiden with Chuck nor can I go here or there to just get out and do stuff.
Today "we" had a sitter to be with us while Daddy was at work, and tomorrow and wed he is home cause no one is around to help out. I also have a ride in to see the girls which I am hoping pans out to be around feeding time since the nurses don't like to take them out of there isolets if its non feeding time.

As for the girls well both were having spells but today is day number two that neither had a single one.. YAY but there still not bottling full feeds and that is a biggie. Morgan is taking usually half of her feed by bottle when they try her, some days less. Riley is only taking about 5 to 7 ml and that is no where close. (A full feed for them is about 45 ml)
Although the nurse today didn't try them all morning and the night nurse tried them at there 8 & 9pm feed (Morgan eats at 12, 4, & 8 and Riley 1, 5, & 9) We are going to ask why they don't attempt to bottle them more then once a day or if that was a "just today thing" I don't see how they are going to get the hang of it, if they don't try as often as possible. The nurse says not to be discouraged and that they will get it eventually however as Chuck says we are not fans of that word. That is what they said about Aiden. He'd get it "eventually" and well 16 months later and he still doesn't have it...
They did however change Riley's feeding times again to 9, 12, 3, & 6 to give her less to digest at a time and help with her spitting up. (She's my spitter) although Morgan can hold her own when she wants too.. We will see if this helps. (Riley will now get 35ml a feed)

Fingers are crossed that they will be home by there 37 week mark or very soon after.. I pray everyday that it's sooner then later.. I know there in a good place and it also gives me a chance to heal but I miss them so much.. Just typing it makes me cry so I am going to stop before Chuck notices and wonders what malfunction I am having now..